It just figures after three months of quarantine I go out in the world and find out everyone messed it up. Now I got to go back in quarantine and this time everyone is joining me. They shut down the bars on St Patty’s Day! That’s like banning pinky rings at the Columbus day parade! Considering everyone is now on lock down and you are all quarantine rookies I figured I’ld give you a run down of how to get this done.

First a quick update on my status. No changes since my last update I am doing the maintenance chemo. My immune system may be back to normal so as far as I can tell I am in as much risk as everyone else of catching this thing you people created while I was on the mend. The wife and I are in full lock down, not because I have cancer but because I am not a moron. Interacting with people isn’t worth catching a cold to me never mind this thing.

So lets talk quarantine. First off this is for the people who are going to do it right. I am talking, in the house only going out for groceries and your blood pressure meds, kind of right. While we are talking meds go through the pharmacy drive-thru! I don’t care if the are flooding the isles with bleach every hour, there is no point to going into Walmart if you don’t have to. That isn’t a quarantine tip that’s common sense. If you are going to hang in your house all week and then hang with your dirty friends on the weekend you should cut to the chase and lick every door knob on the way over. So again, if you are doing it right and staying in here is some tips.

Stock up on some food. Now this is one of those use some common sense things. Obviously when I say stock up on food I don’t mean go full prepper and stockpile beans and bullets. Try to get enough food for one trip a week. What the holy hell are people doing with ten gallons of milk? Don’t be a savage leave some behind for the next guy or gal. If the next guy or gal doesn’t get any food cause you stocked up, they could get desperate enough to kill you in your sleep and take your food.

Entertainment.. Now this is where things get tricky. Sure you got that show you want to watch on Netflix but trust me you want to space that out a bit. You will be surprised how quick four seasons go if you are watching ten hours a day.

Make a list of projects you wanted to do and didn’t have time for. Maybe you wanted to learn a instrument, or read some books but “never had the time”. Well guess what? You got nothing but time now so don’t waste it. I know some of you are stuck home with young children and my advise to you is:
1. Find a time machine
2. Go back to the date of their inception.
3. Make better decisions. You my friend are screwed.

Notice I said young children there? Yeah Mom stop looking for the time machine it’s too late you are stuck with us. Yes even Ryan.

Exercise! You think you are out of shape now? Wait until you emerge all flabby, un-groomed, gray hairs out there for the world to see in two months. Unless you have a 10k square foot home, and I know you don’t cause I don’t have rich friends, then you are not going to get enough exercise when you are at home. It might not seem like a lot but walking around your work and going out to the bar gets you moving. The distance between the couch and fridge is not enough to keep you in shape.

Find a long term game you can play between Netflix binges. The wife and I do huntakiller. It’s not bad for a distraction but not exactly all I hoped it would be. You good at something? Then start a YouTube channel showing off your skills. Make sure to send me the link so I can mock you later.

For the readers that hear start a youtube channel and have no idea what I am talking about; Remember when I said you should take this time to learn some things? Well the internet is one of those things you are going to want to learn about. It will help you pass the time. Just go to google.com and type in what you want to learn about. 50% of the information you will click on will be wrong but it’s better then nothing.

At least now you are in this with the rest of the world. The wife and I were doing the quarantine thing before it was even cool. Now since everyone is doing it Willie Nelson is streaming live concerts from his home to keep everyone entertained. Again for you computer impaired people, click the blue writing above and if you read this before 7pm on 3/19 it will tell you how to see Willie’s concert. So that’s it, hunker down and lets see if we can get through this thing. Feel free to share and ideas in the comment section below.

On a completely unrelated note if anyone knows of a convertible 64-73 Mustang for sale in the New England area let me know.

If anyone wants more detailed information or to donate to research for Multiple Myeloma here is a link to the Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation. These are the people who are most likely to find a cure.