This week I got a lot of news on the cancer front. So buckle up for a cancery blog. Last Friday I went down to Lahey in Burlington to meet with one of the Multi Myeloma experts. I mentioned before about how I am luckier then most who are diagnosed for a number of reasons. One of those reasons is living in New Hampshire I am sixty minutes away from two of the best doctors in the world for Multi Myeloma. Not everyone has the option of talking to doctors who are leaders in their specific form of cancer.

During the vacation I got the biopsy results and it showed that the cancer proteins were down to .065% from 80% when we started. So all signs are pointing to me killing the hell out of this cancer. .065%! That is 99.9+% cancer proteins killed. If I got grades like that in high school I wouldn’t have had to print fake report cards (allegedly). I went today to what could my second to last treatment. Again there is no cure so I could be back on the treatments at a later time but moving to maintenance doses will be a big benchmark.

I headed down to Burlington and of course first things first they have to take their own pint of my blood. Apparently the results from two days before by another lab doesn’t fly. I’m starting to think that the whole industry is selling my blood on the black market. Maybe that’s where all the Marvel Mutants actually come from.

The Doc seemed very surprised that I was up and about after seeing me two months ago in the brace when I couldn’t get around without a cane. He actually brought in one of the nurses and told her how I could barely walk two months ago and “look at me now”. He had me stand up and do a walk about like one of those healed people on the evangelist TV shows. I felt like a prized sow at the county fair.

I told him what my Doc said regarding the results of the biopsy and he told me that he would recommend starting to line up the stem cell treatment.

Apparently there is levels of remissions, there is partial remission, total remissions, and then a couple more I forget the names of. (Listen he was rattling off a lot of Doctor terms and my stenographer was in on vacation in Cabo with her mistress).

Basically you have the standard remission were you have less cancer then you had before you started treatment, then you have 50% less then you started, third is 90% or more less and finally forth you have no cancer. To be a candidate for stem cell they are looking for the 90%. Which I have. He recommends that after this cycle I stop the treatments and go on a maintenance program. This means rather then three drugs over 21 days I will just take a lower dose of one of the drug every day. No more Tuesday treatments and no more sub-dermal injections! I would just have to go in every four weeks to get my bone infusion.

First step is a five hour “Teaching Session” on Thursday. This is where I meet the team and I do mean team. Much like when I started Chemo I got Nurses, Nurse Navigators, Social Worker, Dietitian, Doctor, Physicians assistant and behavioral oncologist…..

What the holy hell is a behavioral Oncologist? Good question, and one I asked. This is basically a cancer Shrink. I apparently have to be of sound mind in order to have the stem cells sucked out of me magiced up and shoved back in. I am not sure how high the on the crazy scale you have to ding to get disqualified from stem cell. Like are we talking about quirky levels of crazy or underwear outside the pants crazy?

I tried to link it to start at 2:45 mark but WordPress apparently doesn’t do that. So again I will say this is not a song you want to play from the start with your office speakers.

Yep just dropped some lazyboy and Nate Dogg on you in the middle of a cancer conversation. It’s an art form really. Probably not something I want to mention to the behavioral Oncologist though. For the record I am underwear inside pants crazy.

The stem cell treatment isn’t a slam dunk at this point. I still have to decide if I want to get it. I have to qualify for it health wise which I don’t think will be an issue. Who knows if I am crazy enough to get by the shrink. I will have a lot more information on the options and process after the 5 hour teaching session as well as an idea of the timeline and side effects. I will be sure to report back with my half-assed understanding of the parts that were important enough to sick in my head. For now enjoy having your musical tastes broadened by Lazyboy and this pic of Tucker who has been under represented in the blog. He is the deep thinker of the family.

If anyone wants more detailed information or to donate to research for Multiple Myeloma here is a link to the Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation. These are the people who are most likely to find a cure. Which means no more blueberry muffins on Tuesday, but also no more shots and drugs that make demon babies. The muffins are good, but not that good.