Saw that quote on facebook today as I was getting ready to leave to get my bone marrow biopsy and thought it was fitting for today’s adventures. Yesterday I started my “week off” of my 4 cycle of treatment. Today I got my bone biopsy and in 7-14 days will know where we are at as far as cancer killing goes. If we are at zero then I am in remission and go on the maintenance doses. I am considering taking the next couple weeks off of treatment either way, I am on vacation starting the 4th and might want 1 or 12 adult beverages. I am currently on the fence on this I might just get the shot to keep my foot on the cancer’s throat while I float in the pool and day drink.

I also setup a little workout spot in my office so I can enjoy the squats, side and normal planks and resistance band workouts in the comfort of my own home. I can’t tell you what joy it brings me. Really I can’t tell you because it would be a lie. Working out sucks. I don’t know what these freaks are talking about when they babble on about the endorphin highs. My endorphins must be stingy MFers cause all I get is sore.

The bone marrow biopsy is an excellent way to spending a morning. You get in there and the nurse walks you through all the paper work. Basically signing off that you know what they are doing and you agree to let them go fishing around in your bone marrow. Then about 45 minutes later Jenna comes in, she is the physician’s assistant that is going to be doing the procedure. She goes through the details of what they are going to do. I lay on my side and they start with a series of lidocaine shots. Starting at the top of the skin and going down till they hit bone. Then they bust out the needle from hell.

I took it like a manly man which means I whimpered a little but did not cry. That stuff burns and they were not going light on the numbing drugs. Once this is finished and set in they use the above corkscrew from hell to burrow down to the bone. First up they make an incision to get the monster needle from hell in. Then they go down through the bone and get some liquid stuff from the bone marrow. This changes the pressure in the bone which is the explanation on why it might be painful (spoiler alert it was). The pulling of the liquid takes all of 5-10 seconds so by the time you really start feeling the pain they are done. Then they go down and try to grab some bone. This is a short cut of sorts seeing if they get a two for one special. In my case it was borderline enough bone and I told them to go back and get whatever they need cause I did not want to come back in a week to do this again.

Monster needle/corkscrew thing goes in again and Jenna starts drilling. Strangely enough the drilling through bone is not painful just when they draw out the liquid. That done Jenna wiggles it out and I get a big ole bandaid. I think all done good to go but nope I got to stay there for another half hour for monitoring. They want to make sure I am not going to pass out or something. The best thing I can say about a bone marrow biopsy is mine is done.

The needle from hell is interesting, they go in with the corkscrew then unscrew the top which takes out the middle. Then need go in with a smaller hollow needle with little pincers on the end to grab some bone stuffs. Then wiggle wiggle (doesn’t feel great btw) their way out. All in all not a fun procedure but far from unbearable. The wife was a little miffed they didn’t let her stay in the room for it. It is unclear if she wanted to be there for me or just enjoys seeing me in pain. By the next update I should know if I am in remission or gearing up for round 5. In the meantime sit tight and enjoy the 4th weekend.